Loving an ALPHA female

Love and relationships are hard on the norm. You are taking two completely different people, with different wants in life, different brains, different love languages, different quirks... and shoving them together and saying, "Okay, figure it out. Make it work." Its never easy, but especially not with an alpha female.

Most alphas have been alphas from a very young age. They have always known who they are and what they want in life. Everyone grows and evolves and those wants change, but alphas always know what those wants are and are working towards them. Alpha females are wolves that have spotted and tracked prey. They will not stop working for what they want until they have it.

Alphas are stubborn as hell. If you tell an alpha what to do (even if they were already planning on doing what you are telling them to do), they are going to either not do it, in spite... or bite your head off for trying to make demands. You cannot push an alpha around. Some alphas have better control of their bite than others. Don't be foolish in thinking you can push those alphas around. Those alphas might not bark and show their teeth as often, but if you continue to poke them.. you just might get mauled by a beast with a lot of pent up aggression. Tread lightly.

Although alpha females are very strong mentally and physically, they are not indestructible. It varies from one alpha, to the next... wherein their weaknesses lie. Every super hero has at least one weakness. It is up to you to recognize where your alpha is vulnerable and what her kryptonite is. Do not use these things against her. Do not try to break or tame her by going after those things. Those people do not deserve an alpha. They don't deserve anyone.

Alphas do not play the victim card. They do not fall into the category of a victim. So rest assured, you are not expected to rush in and save the damsel in distress. On the contrary, in the event that you ever need to knight up and handle some business, you can rest assure your alpha will also be suited up and ready to fight right beside you. You have a warrior in your corner. That is a gift. You need to recognize and appreciate that. Do not treat her like she is anything less than that. She is not. She needs to be your equal, anything less than that simply will not do.

Alphas like to have their egos stroked. Recognize how awesome an alpha is. She works hard to soldier on like she does. She knows no other way... but she still likes the recognition. Words of affirmation are one of her love languages. If she's been working out extra hard, tell her how good she is looking how strong or powerful her body is. Don't blow smoke, she'll see right through that, but take note on what it is she is working towards or how she is handling her business and tell her, "I see you. Well done, girl."

Alphas are strong and they need a partner who is also strong. They are passionate about the things they want... that includes her partner. Connect with her. Challenge her love and match it with yours. When you touch her, be strong an confident. Be there in that moment with her. In the depths of it. She demands your attention, your fire, your best. Coming at her with weak shit... will make her question if she's chosen the right partner, or made a huge mistake. She needs strength, power, intensity, and admiration. She doesn't want it. She needs it.

Alphas can come off as arrogant or selfish. Its easy for them to be a little cocky when they know they're a bad ass. Its also easy to see why an alpha might be a little selfish when they know so clearly what they want in life and need so desperately to get those things. Alphas are always pushing towards their goals. You are either with them on them or you are standing in their way. They need forward momentum in all aspects of their lives, especially the aspects they have set as top priority goals. If they don't have this forward momentum... they aren't living up to their potential. They aren't being or becoming who they want to be. They aren't getting where they want to go. They are wasting their time. They are wasting their life away. They are, frankly... not being their alpha selves and that simply cannot happen.

This can be hard if you are not an alpha, but you're with an alpha. You might be supportive of their wants in life but if you are indirectly (or directly) causing an alpha to not reach their goals or potential... it is going to put major strain on the relationship.

Your alpha may do one of several things.

1. She gets pissed off and resents you. This eats at your relationship until something changes, or it just ends.

2. She gets down on herself and depressed. She's failing at life, but loves you too much to leave you. So she deals with it as best as she can and hopes and prays something changes so she can feel like herself again.

3. She isn't phased. You can't hang with the big dogs? You get left behind. Its as simple as that. Byeeeeeeeee!

4. Nothing changes, nothing is going to change, she's forced to deal with the reality of that. It slowly kills her from the inside out. She is a broken, nothing. A shadow of her former self. Her dreams are gone, her desires are gone, everything she was, is all gone. She is a walking, talking shell of the woman she once was, but hey... you got her, so...

5. Or its a combination/variation of the four.

Alpha's go hard. They are used to doing it all on their own. They don't need you, but they want you. They get excited about the possibilities and heights they can reach with another person. A worthy partner. Maybe it doesn't have to take AS long. Maybe it doesn't have to be AS hard. Maybe... just maybe...

If you have the honor of an alpha female loving you, don't take that lightly. They have chosen you and dubbed you worthy. They are handing you the crown. Can you rise to the occasion?

Always strive to rise.

Sending my love!

Layney Lethal